Demi Lovato FINALLY released her HIGHLY ANTICIPATED new single “Cool For the Summer.” Who exactly was waiting on the edge of their lawn chair all summer for this one, I’m not sure. But it’s here. Yay.

Media outlets have been asking feverishly, “Is this the new gay anthem??” To which the answer is obvious: Fuck no.

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Some are asking if it’s “replacing Katy Perry’s “I Kissed a Girl”???” To which the answer is also obvious: Who gives a shit. Or: Yes, if you mean it’s another terrible pop song about straight girls hooking up with straight girls.

But Lovato is cool, guys. She says “fuck it all” if people judge. Even though two super hot girls making out at a pool party has never invited judgment, just ogling, drooling, and jerking.

This song is not the new gay anthem. This song is for girls who use the term “girl crush.” This song is for girls who want to get wasted and make out with their straight best girl friend and laugh about it the next day. This song is for people who hate music.

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Some of my favorite lyrics include: “Got my mind on your body / And your body on my mind,” because LOL, “Got a taste for the cherry,” (ew), and, my all-time favorite, “Don’t tell your mother.”

Making out with a girl because you’re bi-curious is fine, saying it’s “cool” is weird. It just is what it is. Making out with a girl this summer doesn’t make you cool, it makes you bi-curious, bisexual, and maybe a full-blown lesbian if you’re lucky (then your partners will actually make sure you have orgasms!).

Thanks for this, though, Lovato. I hope it encourages hot girls everywhere to make out at pool parties. Then maybe something positive for gay women can come out of this.